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Here’s Something You Probably Won’t See at Green Slopes: Muko Nage

Wed January 22 2014 2:48 pm
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Residents of Tokamachi, Japan continued a tradition that has been in place since the 18th century – throwing husbands in the snow. The custom, practiced every January 15th, is believed to have started as retaliation against outsiders who married local girls. This year, three kimono-clad husbands were carried to the top of a hill and thrown into six feet of snow. They then rolled down the slope to their waiting wives.

Perhaps this has nothing to do with being a lousy husband, or women being frustrated with their husbands. The Muko Nage actually is a good luck ceremony for couples based on a festival that had something to do with men stealing younger wives.

If you thought husband throwing was punishment for husbands with bad behavior, here’ a list of things women hate …

1. Ogling. Women hate it when they catch you ogling. Women ogle, too; but they have better peripheral vision and don’t get caught.

2. Talking about your ex. All women loathe any conversation about your ex, especially if there is a comparison involved.

3. Talking about your mother. Wives and mother-in-laws are instinctively inclined not to get along. This is all that needs to be said, but it is an especially bad scenario if recipes or cooking comparisons are discussed.

4. Forgetting anniversaries or minimizing holidays. Big mistake to forget a birthday or anniversary, but lack of attention to Christmas, New Year’s Eve, Valentine’s Day can also be harmful if your woman finds these holidays important to celebrate as a couple.

5. Adjusting Mr. Private Parts. This can be especially bad if it is done while lying on the couch watching football.

6. Leaving pans and dishes to soak. This should be common sense, even though soaking does cut down on a lot of labor.

7. Keeping old shoes or old baseball hats. There’s nothing better than a nice, old comfortable pair of shoes, except that women hate them — especially if they smell.

8. Repeating a story from old glory days. Telling about an old sports victory or college escapade with the bros is bad enough, but repeating the story because you forgot you already told it … bad move.

9. Belching, passing gas, excessive hair from nose or ears. No explanation necessary.

10. Doing something solo that should have been a joint decision. Maybe it’s buying a TV or a new computer without joint consultation, or maybe making plans over the weekend; but if it’s done or committed without consultation, there could be prolonged damaging effects.

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