Ask Paul B: Plastic Marriage!


Dear Paul B,

I will keep this short, because I am tired of this life. My wife is very attractive and she never thinks so. She is only 38, but thinks she always needs to look better, and it is NOT because of me. I never thought she needs any surgery, but she wants to have her third surgery in October. She works part time, so the burden to pay for this is again mine. I am still paying $700 per month for the next 40 months, and I already work two jobs. I feel like such a jerk, but she insists that she needs to be happy. Sometimes I think I should tell her no way! My kids think she is wasting our money since we haven’t had a vacation in three years!



Dear Jack,

Since you brought it up, you are a jerk. Stop being used. Families should make these decisions together, and your wife is the selfish one here. How many jobs should you take to keep her boobs up, and her thighs slim? Perhaps she needs two or three jobs to stay away from the Fritos, chips and dips? You are no young man any longer, and your kids too will be paying the price for their Mom’s vanity. I do know some women who have been so empowered with their knew bodies and faces that they seek younger men at some point. Just say “no, honey, we can’t do it now because we will be in debt forever and I won’t do it to our family.” Just make sure there are no bricks are fire-place implements around when you discuss. Good luck, Jack.

Paul B


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