Ask Paul B: Breaking Up … Hard to Do

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Dear Paul B,

Tim and I were “The Couple” for over three years. It was everyone’s vision that we would be married, and live happily…..Then, he tells me, right out of the blue, that it’s over. He was overwhelmed with his old girlfriend from college, and he just could not walk away. I was told is via a text from out of town. I don’t believe it for a minute, and I am deeply hurt. I don’t know what to do, and couldn’t he tell me to my face. I love him, and I don’t want it to be over. What’s my option at this point? I still have clothes, a new TV and my jewelry at his place. He didn’t leave me much to go on here.


Dear Gracie,

I feel bad for you. Love hurts, sometimes, but it’s rarely an easy task to break up. Someone always gets hurt. Your options are to wait until he calls you, which should be soon (I hope.) Men can be cowards when it comes to ending a relationship. I would wait a few days, but then call to collect your belongings. It sounds like you didn’t see it coming, and that is even more painful to accept. I’m not so sure that your love for him was returned, so it is better now that you are dealing with this situation than after the birth of a child or two….Divorce is ugly, and the children do take the hit…Gracie, you are young (I am guessing,) and your whole life is ahead of you to meet others, whom will offer a more mature love, a deeper love. Men can go through a long “proving ground” before they are ready to settle down with The Right One, and some just never do.

Paul B

Music video by Kelly Clarkson performing Since U Been Gone. (C) 2004 19 Recordings Limited. Behavior not recommended, of course.


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